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Salt and Pepper Fox | Victoria | 539 Johnson St.


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#21 spanky123

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 05:54 AM

The last big story like this locally (Chuck's) turned out to be true, and now that guy is facing criminal charges.

I'm inclined to believe there are a bunch of creepy dudes in the industry, which seems more likely than there being some large number of people who would make false accusations.

 

To be technically correct, the guy from Chucks was arrested in Ontario for crimes he allegedly committed there after a witness came forward and made a statement to police. From what I know, he has not been charged with anything here and nobody here has made a police complaint.

 

Here is the flip side of the rush to judgment and social media attacks. From what I understand, in one of the cases brought to light, one of the people who was accused wasn't at the party when the event happened. He had been there and then left. The 'survivor' hadn't realized he had left and named him along with others on social media. The person lost their job, was blackballed from the industry and was never given any chance to plead their case. The reaction from the 'survivor' community was that either "he was a rich white privledged guy anyways" or "he had been at the party and should have known his buddies would act inappropriately so he should have prevented it".  


Edited by spanky123, 25 June 2021 - 06:11 AM.

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#22 Victoria Watcher

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 05:58 AM

To be technically correct, the guy from Chucks was arrested in Ontario for crimes he allegedly committed there after a witness came forward and made a statement to police. From what I know, he has not been charged with anything here and nobody here has made a police complaint.

 

The Victoria Police Department is investigating Jesse Chiavaroli — who also goes by Jesse Chaves — for “sexualized violence.”

 

No charges have been laid and the allegations have not been tested in court.

 

https://www.durhamre...-investigation/

 

if that is accurate there was likely a police complaint here.


Edited by Victoria Watcher, 25 June 2021 - 05:59 AM.


#23 spanky123

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 06:10 AM

^ I don't know what standard VicPD uses for "investigation", whether anonymous posts on a message board is sufficient or they need an actual real person to make a statement.



#24 Belleprincess

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 06:18 AM

To be technically correct, the guy from Chucks was arrested in Ontario for crimes he allegedly committed there after a witness came forward and made a statement to police. From what I know, he has not been charged with anything here and nobody here has made a police complaint.

Here is the flip side of the rush to judgment and social media attacks. From what I understand, in one of the cases brought to light, one of the people who was accused wasn't at the party when the event happened. He had been there and then left. The 'survivor' hadn't realized he had left and named him along with others on social media. The person lost their job, was blackballed from the industry and was never given any chance to please their case. The reaction from the 'survivor' community was that either "he was a rich white privledged guy anyways" or "he had been at the party and should have known his buddies would act inappropriately so he should have prevented it".


Yes, this is usually the narrative. I hear that often “they should have known” or “I’d rather believe a liar than support a rapist” .. and fair enough. However - what recourse do these men have when everything is done anonymously?

#25 spanky123

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 06:25 AM

Yes, this is usually the narrative. I hear that often “they should have known” or “I’d rather believe a liar than support a rapist” .. and fair enough. However - what recourse do these men have when everything is done anonymously?

 

The rub is they have no recourse. They could pay $50K to sue a bunch of nobodies with no money who would likely get free legal support from some activist group who would then portray the complainant as re-victimizing the 'survivor'.

 

The reality is they leave town and start over somewhere else and hope that their new associates don't use google. 


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#26 Mike K.

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 06:26 AM

Or they don't, and just keep on truckin' in plain sight.  :rtfm:


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#27 Belleprincess

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 06:30 AM

The rub is they have no recourse. They could pay $50K to sue a bunch of nobodies with no money who would likely get free legal support from some activist group who would then portray the complainant as re-victimizing the 'survivor'.

The reality is they leave town and start over somewhere else and hope that their new associates don't use google.


I’m surprised Instagram is willing to host this type of endeavour. In the states, they can’t get sued for what is posted on their platform. However, in Canada, there is nothing that protects them.

#28 spanky123

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 06:33 AM

I’m surprised Instagram is willing to host this type of endeavour. In the states, they can’t get sued for what is posted on their platform. However, in Canada, there is nothing that protects them.

 

Probably why the "survivors story" folks made the group private. 



#29 Belleprincess

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 06:44 AM

Or they don't, and just keep on truckin' in plain sight. :rtfm:


And how do you think that will work out for them? I mean, rapist is worse than murderer nowadays

#30 Mike K.

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 06:47 AM

It's certainly not a standard operating procedure, that's for sure.


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#31 UDeMan

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 02:25 PM

This is why work from home is going to end. These guys need the women back in the office to prey on them.

For an example my old manager had met all his former wife's/ common-/law partners in the office. When he retired he was on number 4.

#32 Victoria Watcher

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 02:30 PM

This is why work from home is going to end. These guys need the women back in the office to prey on them.

For an example my old manager had met all his former wife's/ common-/law partners in the office. When he retired he was on number 4.

That’s not the only way to meet them though.

We have Tinder today. You can usually confirm in advance if there will be sex on the first date. then if you like one another after that who knows, there might be second or third dates leading to marriage.

/old white guy on island opinion

Edited by Victoria Watcher, 25 June 2021 - 02:35 PM.


#33 Rob Randall

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 03:00 PM

We have Tinder today. You can usually confirm in advance if there will be sex on the first date. then if you like one another after that who knows, there might be second or third dates leading to marriage.

 

A woman that went on a Tinder date this week told me the guy asked consent so many times over the evening she almost had to say look, I said yes alright, hurry up.


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“I mean I just don’t understand the big Texas part, like maybe he’s from Texas? I want to know the back story.”


#34 Victoria Watcher

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 03:13 PM

I was discussing a CBC story from a week or so ago about “stealthing” with a single female friend.

https://www.cbc.ca/n...sault-1.6062324

I remarked that her (the article subject) biggest concern was the condom issue but not about sleeping with guy on first day she met him.

my friend said it’s completely socially acceptable to sleep on the first internet date.

I said that might be true but successful and emotionally fulfilled people are not doing that.

she has not talked to me since.

Edited by Victoria Watcher, 25 June 2021 - 03:16 PM.

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#35 spanky123

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 03:19 PM

This is why work from home is going to end. These guys need the women back in the office to prey on them.

For an example my old manager had met all his former wife's/ common-/law partners in the office. When he retired he was on number 4.

 

25% of all relationships start at the workplace. As long as the employee is not a direct report of their manager then most offices don't have an issue with romance.



#36 SimonH

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Posted 25 June 2021 - 03:32 PM

I was discussing a CBC story from a week or so ago about “stealthing” with a single female friend.

https://www.cbc.ca/n...sault-1.6062324

I remarked that her (the article subject) biggest concern was the condom issue but not about sleeping with guy on first day she met him.

my friend said it’s completely socially acceptable to sleep on the first internet date.

I said that might be true but successful and emotionally fulfilled people are not doing that.

she has not talked to me since.

Could you give me her internet details ? :)


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#37 Mike K.

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Posted 26 June 2021 - 06:24 AM

my friend said it’s completely socially acceptable to sleep on the first internet date.

I said that might be true but successful and emotionally fulfilled people are not doing that.

she has not talked to me since.


You still hear the relationships that work out long term start slowly. I’m not even saying 1+ years, but 5+. Maybe that’s because the first interaction is usually one based on personality and charisma, not physical looks.

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#38 Victoria Watcher

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Posted 26 June 2021 - 06:34 AM

some of us with poor physical looks will never know both scenarios I guess.

#39 Mike K.

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Posted 26 June 2021 - 07:02 AM

The trick might be to have your Bugatti lead the way on your profile picture.
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#40 spanky123

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Posted 26 June 2021 - 10:06 AM

We have Tinder today. You can usually confirm in advance if there will be sex on the first date. then if you like one another after that who knows, there might be second or third dates leading to marriage.

 

Except that by law consent can be withdrawn at any time. Just because you agreed to it in advance doesn't mean that it is permitted when you actually get down to it. That is probably why Mike's bud asked every 5 minutes!


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