Barbara Gilmour has decided to lay her missing daughter to rest so she might get some rest, too.
For the past seven years, the Parksville mother has done everything she can to find her daughter Carmel, who disappeared in November 2017.
Gilmour is under no illusion she will find her daughter alive. Carmel, 36, was a mother of two, and also an addict who hung around with dangerous people living in a homeless encampment near Parksville.
Gilmour believes Carmel was murdered or died of a drug overdose that someone covered up.
“I will not torture myself with 20 years of searching,” she said. “I don’t believe it’s a missing person’s case. At this point, I think it’s going to be DNA.”
Though she speaks matter-of-factly, losing her daughter has been devastating for Gilmour. She said she has often been approached by townspeople who tell her of their dreams and visions of Carmel.
“It’s agony. There are times I want to move out of this town because it tortures me,” she said.
Laying Carmel to rest will involve some kind of ceremony, said her mother.
“She deserves that. She was a good person and was loved by a lot of people.”
Gilmour understands the instability and addiction that rocked her daughter’s life.
When Carmel was born in Cranbrook in 1981, Gilmour was a single mother struggling with alcohol and drug addiction in the East Kootenay.
When Carmel was two, Gilmour gave her up for adoption and moved back to Parksville, where her family has lived for five generations. Carmel was returned to her at age four, but both she and her older brother ended up in ministry care while Gilmour got the help she needed.
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